Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Day One

A blog a day for forty days -- a lofty goal; one we may not exactly keep. Amy and I started the Love Dare last night. Our marriage is so perfect we thought 'Why not spice it up a little?' I'm kidding, kind of. Amy and I are truly made for each other, to put it Biblically she literally 'completes me.' She is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I am VERY lucky to have her. We all know that a successful, meaningful, fulfilling, healthy, happy marriage takes work. It takes good communication and time investments to really get the greatest benefits. We work hard in both of these areas, always quick to discuss and resolve any slight disagreements. Amy is a wonderful communicator, and she helps to keep our marriage as healthy as any!

Recently we attended a married couples event at our church. We were given the book 'The Love Dare'. This is the book the movie 'Fireproof'' was based on. It challenges couples to commit to 40 days of 'dares' that promise to make our marriage and relationship stronger. Furthermore, we are encouraged to journal about our journey through these dares. We decided what better way than on our blog! Oh the transparency! Please know we have not read ahead; and we don't really know what we are in for -- so bear with us. Amy and I will take turns sharing our thoughts every other day, the non-authoring of the two of us will add comments at the end.

Receive this as a warning. This forty day journey cannot be taken lightly. It is a challenging and often difficult process, but an incredibly fulfilling one. To take this dare requires a resolute mind and a steadfast determination. It is not meant to be sampled or briefly tested, and those who quit early will forfeit the greatest benefits. If you will commit to a day at a time for forty days, the results could change your life and your marriage. Consider it a dare, from others who have done it before you.

(Note -- we have collectively decided that some of these forty days may be postponed in the event that I am absent for most of a given day. How can we succeed at the dare if I am away at work? So in the event we miss a day on our post, you will know why.)

Today's dare was to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative at all to our spouse.

This was so difficult as we are typically Negative Nellies that never have a kind thing to say to anyone.

Of course I'm kidding! I was excited about this dare. I woke up this morning looking forward to the success of dare number one. Amy and I always choose our words carefully, although sometimes 'the truth hurts.' We are careful to never tear each other down or otherwise belittle one another.

Dare successfully passed! The most negative thing Amy said to me today was that I didn't look good in some pants that I was trying on at the store, which is fine because they were $50 more than the alternative. Of course Amy sees this as 'saving me' from looking like an idiot. I'm of course joking. If we took this that literally then the word 'no' wouldn't be allowed, and how would we ever keep Claire in line?

If you've followed our blog for very long, then you're familiar with this post. Steve and I take our marriage very seriously and put each other at the top of our lists of priorities, second only to God. In keeping with this, we have, since the first night after returning home from our honeymoon, read some sort of devotional together. The Love Dare is sure to be an exciting new step for us.
As for today's negative speech and demonstration of patience, all I have to say is "Have you met Steve?!" I have never met a more patient person in my entire life (unless he's hungry - then he acts like Claire). And no, my comment was not a negative, simply a statement of fact that anyone who has indeed met Steve would agree with. Steve is the most wonderful friend, husband and father. He is very patient with me and with our daughter. And Steve is also extremely positive, looking for the best in everyone and every situtation. As is typical for Steve 365 days a year, he did not speak anything negative to me today and was extremely patient with me.
And to clarify, he really didn't look good in those pants. But it was the pants' fault, not his. I helped him to find a better pair.


Valerie said...

Ya'll are too cute. And I must agree -- you two as a whole are one of the most inspiring married couples I have met, so this love dare challenge will be interesting to see how it affects you, since, at least from the rest of the world looking in, you all are pretty close to perfection in my book! And I personally will enjoy reading the day to day challenges and hopefully will be able to apply some of them to my marriage as well. Thanks for sharing with the rest of us and being transparent.

Ryan, Jill and Kids said...

Love it! We are reading the book, not doing it, but, maybe we will??
We have given the movie and book away before as a gift to someone and thought we should read it before we give it to someone else.
We miss you guys!