“Marriage has a way of altering our vision. We go in expecting our mate to fulfill our hopes and to make us happy. But this is an impossible order for our spouse to fill. Unrealistic expectations breed disappointment. The higher your expectations, the more likely your spouse will fail you and cause you frustration. Divorce is inevitable when people refuse to allow their spouses to be human. You must choose to live by encouragement rather than by expectations. Love teaches you to give them room to be themselves. Don’t you want married life to be a place where you can enjoy free expression of who you are, growing within a safe environment that encourages you even when you fail? Your spouse does too – and love gives them that privilege. Make a commitment to daily let go of unrealistic expectations and become your spouse’s greatest encourager.”
Today’s Dare: Eliminate the poison of unrealistic expectations in your home. Think of one area where your spouse has told you you’re expecting too much, and tell them you’re sorry for being so hard on them about it. Promise them you’ll seek to understand, and assure them of your unconditional love.
While I can’t think of a specific example of this in my marriage, I can clearly see where I have put unrealistic expectations on other relationships in my life. I am learning to allow others to be human, and I am learning to let go of offenses.
Steve and I determined early on in our relationship that we would be one another’s biggest fan. When you’re always looking for something to cheer about, you tend to stop seeing all of the things that could potentially annoy you and start seeing all of the wonderful things your spouse does.
I love you, Steven. Unconditionally. Completely. Forever.
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