Why oh Why?

I went to the Dentist the other day, and while it’s not my favorite place the Dentist Amy and I currently patronize is pretty good, and does a great job of keeping it pain free. There is one thing I can certainly do without. Keeping in mind the carpet cleaning incident and my desire to remain conflict free, I couldn’t help myself I had to draw the line.

So the lady comes in to do my X-Rays, and when she puts the little things in my mouth I smell and taste something strange that reminds me of middle school for some strange reason. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but I decide that they have either flavored the X-Ray film or the lady administering the torture has a most unique (not necessarily in a good way) perfume on. I can’t wait for her to leave.

Once she leaves and the hygienist shows up I smell the odor again. Determined to figure it out I put on my detective hat and start paying close attention to what is going on. After she puts the napkin around my neck and hands me the safety glasses I solve the mystery.

“Are your gloves scented?” I ask, she looks at me bewildered, “Why yes they are, isn’t that fun?” “NO!! I’m sorry but you will have to find some that aren’t I think its awful.” She remarks “I’m not sure we have any others,” “Well,” I say “please try to find some others because I can’t handle that.”

She finds some (while probably sneering to her co-workers what a difficult patient I was being) and the cleaning goes on without incident. So my question, who thinks of this stuff? What was wrong with the vinyl taste and smell we have all endured for years and years? While she was hunting new gloves I peered at the box and sure enough in big letters with graphics “NEW GRAPE SCENT” why oh why? That explained the middle school memories, Bubblicious Grape Gum, tasty. But seriously to think someone not only invented and marketed these, but a nincompoop (fun word) in that office actually consciously ordered them!

I’m calling for a stand, let none of our readers accept these horrid flavored disease barriers; insist on generic unflavored gloves from now on.

UPDATE: Amy went in a few days later, and odor didn’t bother her, she told the hygienist of my complaint and she remarked that they have had these gloves for years, maybe I was just being ultra sensitive, or perhaps (more likely) the box my gloves came out of were double dipped.